Not A Mega Church? Building a Youth Ministry that Lasts no matter what size Church you are!

20Jul/100

2 Lessons Learned from Sandy Koufax

Late in June, I got an issue of Investor's Business Daily.  When I was looking through newspaper, I saw an interesting article about Sandy Koufax. Being the baseball enthusiast that I am, I was quickly drawn to it.  You can read the IBD article here.

Reading the article, I was shocked to read that Sandy Koufax was close to quitting baseball after the first 6 years of his professional career as he was struggling hard. His record after those 6 seasons was 36-40!  Considering that Sandy is a Hall-of-Famer who is viewed by many as one of the best pitchers every to play major league baseball, this was very surprising.  I had no idea!  I thought he was great from the moment he stepped on the mound for the first time.  Despite this rough start, he did not quit and ended up with a record of 165-87, going 129-47 from 1961 on.

So what made the difference?  How did he go from an bad to Hall-of-Famer?  He did 2 things during the offseason that changed everything.  He:

  1. worked out. Never before had he worked out and took care of his body.  So he started running in hopes to better equip his body to find out exactly how good he could be a a pitcher.
  2. started listening to advice. People within the Dodger organization had always tried to give Sandy advice but he never listened.  It was during the offseason a Dodger Scout found an issue with his pitching mechanics.  Once he corrected it, he was better able to see the target.  Also, Sandy started listening to his catcher, Norm Sherry.   Norm told Sandy to throwing more curveballs and change-ups to keep the opposing batters guessing.  Even though Sandy had heard this before, he never applied it.  This time he did and it really helped!

Ultimately, the bottom line is that what made Sandy Koufax a Hall-of-Fame pitcher and living legend was his willingness to adapt and change.  Too often in ministry we can be set in our ways and do the same things all the time.  Why?  Because that is how we always did things.  Well, that just isn't acceptable. If we are to stay in ministry long term (especially youth and other "transition year" ministries like children's, college and young adult work), then we HAVE to be willing to adapt and change.  This age range changes all the time so our attempts to minister to them needs to change.  The ideas, events, lessons that used to work all the time do not necessarily work now.

The problem is, how do you know what you need to do to change unless you have an effective way of evaluating yourself?  Sure, you may have a general idea of where you need to adapt or what you need to change, but it is always great to have an "outsiders" perspective.

So right now, TAKE A MINUTE and set up a plan to evaluate your ministry.  Here's just 1 way you can get a good evaluation:

  1. Contact a parent whom you trust and respect or another youth minister from another ministry or church.  Ask them to come by and evaluate an upcoming ministry event (i.e., "youth group" or a social function).  The key here is to have someone you know and trust while being honest with you at the same time.
  2. When they arrive to evaluate, give that person(s) a set of 2-3 goals you hope to accomplish during the meeting. You can also tell them what principles you value highly as a leadership team (You can look at what we value here as an example).  Therefore, they will know what you are striving for and what you view as important so they will be able to discern whether or not you are hitting your mark.
  3. Give them a few days to collect their thoughts and/or write them down on paper.  Then set up a meeting with them and your volunteer leaders to go through the evaluation together.  That way you can all hear how it went, unfiltered.
  4. Lastly, pray through what you all heard, process and start implementing change where needed.

Evaluation and self-examination is not always easy or fun.  But it is necessary to build a lasting ministry.  Had Sandy Koufax not taken a hard look at himself, we may have never heard of him and he would probably have always lived in a state of "what if".  Let's be like Sandy and evaluate, adapt and change where needed.

Got a comment or thought?  Post it so we may all benefit and grow as followers of Christ and ministers.

Thanks to my Sources:

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5Jul/101

3 Ways to help develop Community within your Ministry Staff

When I was getting ready to take my first full-time ministry job as Jr. High Intern, I was telling my boss how much I was looking forward to working with all the church staffers.  It was almost like I was in la-la land thinking that every staffer would work great with each other and it would be this perfect utopia.  Then my boss told me something that has always stuck with me.  He cautioned me and told me that working at a church is no different than working at some other secular institution.  He said that there are a ton of staff dynamics and relationships that are unhealthy and non-functioning.  I did not want to believe him because, as a young intern I was thinking that working in a ministry brings out the best, most christlike characteristics in all of us. But unfortunately, they do not.

Church staff dynamics are definitely tricky to navigate through and can be extremely dangerous.  After spending over 13 years in full-time ministry (I've worked at 3 different churches and 1 para-church ministry), I have seen my share of interesting church staff dynamics. But, it doesn't have to be that way. There are ways that you can have positive staff dynamics and community.  Here are just 3 things I learned that can help church staff dynamics improve and build a community that can be strong and for each other.

  1. Do things together outside of Church. If all the church staff does together is work together, then how can they possibly expect to love, serve and want to work side-by-side with each other?  Of all the places I have worked, the ones that take time to do things outside of church together are the ones where there seems to be more healthy interactions together.  After all, how can you possibly be frustrated with another staffer when you get to shoot them up all day long at laser tag?  Just kidding, but seriously, there is a bond that starts to be developed when you go out to lunch together or grab a coffee, or do a quick errand together.  Walls and barriers that may try to exist between staffers can quickly come down if you spend time together, outside of the Church walls.  Another idea would be to do more Staff functions.  Have staff and spouse dinners together, or special event times like a Christmas party.  These will all help.
  2. Share about personal lives. I believe that if you really want a team to work together for a common purpose, you have to invest in each other and get to know each other.  This doesn't mean that you have to go and share all your dirty laundry, but it would be good for you all to get to know who each of you all are and what makes you all tick.  That way, when something big happens in your (or a member of the staff) life, the rest of staff can come around and support them.  Regardless, getting to know who each staffer is helps to break down walls when conflict does arise (which it will).
  3. Keep short accounts. This has burned countless relationships.  When short accounts are not kept, bickering, bitterness, anger and a whole lot of other unhealthy emotions start to get in the way.  Do not let conflict give Satan a foothold.  You may not like confrontation, but if you do not bring an issue before another staffer, Satan WILL use it against you and the church.  You need to bring the issue into the light and deal with it.  Personally, I do not like confrontation, but I have found over the years that if I do not share and bring the issue up, I become very unhealthy and it causes so much bitterness and anger inside of me.  I HAVE  to bring it up or else Satan will destroy me.

I believe that in order for these 3 to really take off is to have strong senior leadership.  This is really the bottom line.  Staffers want to be led.  They don't want to see double standards or favoritism.  They need someone to lead them, that can say the hard work and challenge while encouraging and spurring them on at the same time.  This may be in your control (if you are the ministry head) or out of your control.  But regardless of your role, you can do something.  You can personally do the above 3 regardless of whether or not senior leadership does.

Obviously these are not the only ways to develop and build community amongst the staff, but these are 3 that I have found helpful over the years.  What do you think?  Have you seen these or other ways work in your ministry?  If so, how?  Post a comment so we can all benefit.

Then, TAKE A MINUTE and examine how you can do a better job of helping build community with your fellow co-workers.  Is it one of the above 3 or is it something else?  Examine your situation, bring it before the Lord for wisdom and direction and then act.

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21Jun/100

When was the last time you…

  • Called a fringe student?
  • Said a hard word to a student or leader?
  • Took a day off?
  • Recognize a leader for all their hard work?
  • Went on a date with your significant other or spouse?
  • Turned off your phone or computer?
  • Lead someone to the Lord?
  • Went up to the school after school or during lunch to hang with students?
  • Spent time actually studying scripture for yourself and not for others?
  • Sacrificed your own plans so that another department (i.e. Children's ministry) can do something instead?
  • Did contact work with parents?
  • Exercised?

There are many times when we get caught up in the day-to-day administrative activities of being a "youth minister" that we forget some really important things that we need to do.  This is just a small sample of things that many of us love to do but get sidetracked from doing.

So right now, TAKE A MINUTE and re-read this list.  Is there something on this list that you haven't done in a while?  If so, do it this week.  Then see how God impacts your life, another person's life and/or your ministry this week because you did 1 or more of these items you may have forgotten about.

Also, if I missed something on this list, feel free to add it so that we can be encouraging each other to not just be better youth ministers but better followers of Christ as well.

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11Jun/100

Superstar Youth Ministers?

On Tuesday, June 8, Stephen Strasburg pitched his first major league game.  Now, if you know nothing about baseball, then the name Stephen Strasburg means nothing to you.  But, if you are a baseball or Washington Nationals fan (I am both), then this was a very important day.  He has been called the savior of the Nationals, a Phenom, the real deal.  If you want to read more about his first performance, you can read columns in the Washington Post by Thomas Boswell here and Mike Wise here.

Has anyone ever described you as a youth minister that way?  That you were going to save the youth group?  That you are a Phenom?  That the students love you and will do anything for you?  I bet people have described you that way at some time or another.  The problem is that when people (especially people in Church Leadership) describe you this way, they are setting yourself and themselves up for failure.  They are putting the weight of the program on just 1 person.  They are relying on the Youth Minister to be a superstar and to perform at extraordinary levels constantly.

The reality is there are NO superstar youth ministers out there.  As much as I bought into this lie when people kept on telling me how great I was, I realized that being a "superstar" lasts only so long.  When your "superstar" aura begins to fade, everyone around you questions even the smallest of things and the Church lose faith in you.  People begin to look for the next "superstar" to take your place.

In his book Sustainable Youth Ministry, Mark DeVries talks about the Superstar Youth Minister. He says,

    "Too many churches are looking for a dynamic, top-notch, committed, magnetic, relational, creative, organized, theologically informed, twenty-two-year-old who can present powerful, life-changing messages and will gratefully work for $23,000 a year.  The excruciatingly exaggerated requirements found in so many of these job descriptions gives evidence of little more than a history of chronic dissatisfacation with those who have gone before". (Sustainable Youth Ministry, p. 44)

Mark goes on to say,

    "Superstar-syndrome churches spend sacrifical amounts of energy on the roller-coaster rid of gambling on the next youth pastor.  But ironically, superstar youth ministries come from churches that spend their energy creating a climate and building an infrastructure in which moderately gifted, garden-variety youth directors produce superstar results". (Sustainable Youth Ministry, p. 50)

The reality is that Youth Ministers do not have to be superstars to produce superstar results.  Even though youth ministers may get the credit, we ultimately have to give credit to where credit is due - Christ.  When we begin to think we are the star and the reason for the success of a ministry, we take away from what God is clearly doing and  blessing and we start to get into some shady waters.  Remember, it is God who works in us and among us.  We can't change hearts - the Lord is the only one who can do that.  Again, as I mentioned above, when youth ministers get put into the box of being a superstar, failure is bound to happen and often times the end result is not pretty.

Therefore, youth ministers need to protect themselves from the superstar syndrome.   Because we should not, and our churches should not expect us to be "Superstar Youth Ministers", we need to be mindful of a few key points as we take on a youth ministry job or are currently in one.

Use the honeymoon period to your advantage. When you first start off in a new youth ministry job, there is a period of time in which you can do no wrong.  Even if you do wrong, there is a ton of grace given by others.  Believe me, I know!  I probably should have been fired numerous times from mistakes and errors in judgment I made within this "honeymoon" period.  Unfortunately, the honeymoon eventually ends and different results are expected then - which is completely right.  Therefore, be mindful of this period and use the grace that is extended to you.  BUT make sure you have a strategic plan in place so that you are moving the program in the right direction.  If you want help on developing a strategic plan, click here and here.  By showing the Church leadership you have a plan in place and that you are moving in a certain direction, that will help their fears or concerns they have about a mistake or 10 you made during the honeymoon period.

Stay teachable. There is a difference between confidence and teachability.  If you walk into a new job believing you have the right way and everyone else doesn't, you may be setting yourself up for a major fallout or coup.  OR, If you have a current job and you believe that you have the right way and that everyone else has no idea what they are talking, you are entering a dangerous world.  I have seen too many youth ministers walk in and alienate all those who would love to help them.  They set apart parents, leadership and students who have invested a lot of time and energy into the program by turning aside their opinions and thoughts all because they feel that they have the right way to do ministry.  What ends up happening then is that the Church loses faith in the youth minister, attendance drops and before you know it the Church is looking for a new youth minister.

It is our job always to stay teachable!  Of all the ministries out there, Youth Ministry probably changes the most rapidly because youth are changing on a daily basis.  Therefore, we cannot expect old methods, ideas or programs to work just because they did in the past.  We have to continue to learn!  Each Church and ministry is different so every youth minister has to adapt and continue to learn the best way to minister in that particular context.  Again, if he/she fails to do that, there will be serious fallout.  It is just a matter of when.  Stay teachable and learn from all people and circumstances.  If we take this mentality, we will benefit, the students will benefit and the health of the program will benefit.

Trust and Rely on the Lord always. The reality is that people will always fail you.  God never will.  When we trust and rely on the words of our bosses, parents, students, spouses and others and rely less on the Truth of the Lord, we are setting ourselves up for disappointment.  God never promised us that we will ride off into the sunset and as along as we do His will we will live a great life.  That is not how it plays out.  But too often our trust and reliance on others supersedes Christ in our lives.  We need to cling to Christ always.  No matter what someone says about you (good or bad), we cannot allow that to replace our reliance and faith in Christ in our lives.  We need to cling to Him and His direction always.

For what it's worth, Stephen Strasburg went on to win his 1st game.  He pitched 7 innings, struck out 14 (a team record), allowed just 2 runs and threw 94 pitches.  After 1 start, he has lived up to the expectations.  What I am curious about is how he handles his next start or even a rough start?  Actually, I'm probably more curious as to how the Nationals handle a rough start.  Obviously, Strasburg will have a honeymoon period as the people of Washington, DC are just excited to have him on their team. But what happens if he struggles 1 year?  Will they want him out?  Will they try to trade him?  Probably not because in baseball people know it takes time and 1 bad year doesn't constitute change.

In Youth Ministry, you may get pumped up to be the "superstar" and that you can or have saved the youth program.  Do not buy into the lie.  Remain grounded in Christ, trusting Him above all thing to guide and direct you.  You may have a bad month, semester or even year.  Regardless of that, trust in the Lord and allow Him to direct your path and be patient!  God will work you through it.  It may not be easy, but He will work you through it.

What do you all think?

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4May/103

Where does Privacy apply to a Public Position?

This is a follow up to the poll I did 2 weeks ago.  I appreciate everyone who voted on the poll and made a comment.  They were very helpful as I continue to process this interesting debate.

I will preface this post by saying that this is something that I have been debating in my head for the past 9 months.  Even thought I will state a position on this, I am NOT saying I am right.  This is just how I view things and what God is teaching me.  I believe that this debate, especially in small to medium size churches, has HUGE potential to impact both your ministry and family at the same time.  So whether you have, are currently in or will in the future deal with this issue, it think that it is extremely important that you have thought through on how you will handle it.

The Debate

Where does privacy apply to being in a public Church Leadership position?  Do you, as a Church staffer have the right to your privacy in your personal life or should everything be made public?

On one side there will be people who argue that you have the right to your privacy.  They will argue that as long as your ministry is not being compromised, that you are acting with full integrity of the spiritual position and that you are fulfilling your job description you have been called to, you have that right to privacy.

On the other side, there will be people who argue that as a public spiritual leader, your private life is public.  Sure, not everything in your private life needs to be shared, but when it comes to struggles or tough situations for you or your family, the congregation has the right to know what is going on.  This “side” will argue that if you are transparent with who you are, then God will work and that the body of Christ will surround this person and family with love, support and compassion.

My Position

If you have been involved in ministry for any number of years, or even months, you will know that a ministry job is not your normal 9-5, Monday thru Friday job.  We work on the weekends, at nights, in the early mornings.  We get paid less than most other professionals with the same amount of experience.  We work on the football fields, at Starbucks or in the mall.  We are not able to worship in our own Church the same way members of our congregation can.  After all, Sunday is a workday.  I do not need to go much further for you to get the point - there is very little that is considered "normal" when you work in a ministry position - especially youth ministry.

Because there is this lack of normalcy in being a minister, this debate is not easily decided.  There is a lot of “grey” in this debate.  For example, when you feel that the Lord is calling you to accept the job as “minister” you are held to a different standard.  As a Youth Pastor, I understand and accept that responsibility and my calling.  In Titus 1:7-9, Paul points out that we are held to a higher standard as “overseers” and “elders”.  Again, this is a standard I accept and affirm.  I know that if I were to struggle with certain things, such as adultery or illegal drug use (which I never have), these are some of things that need to be brought into the light.  But, where do the boundaries lie between what Paul calls us to and what other people’s expectations (unfair or not) are?  Let me explain.

Does this same standard that Paul outlined in Titus apply to your family as well?  Just because I have accepted that role and responsibility of the higher standard, does that mean they have to accept that same role and responsibility? Obviously, as spouses and parents, we desire for our whole family to follow the Lord with as much passion as we do.  But just because we have committed to follow the Lord and serve Him in a position of authority, does that mean the rest of our family is held to that exact same standard that Paul outlines in Titus 1?

Ultimately, what I am getting at is I think our views of who our “overseers” should be are out whack.  The biblical standards are right on, but I think that over time, this has caused our congregations to expect ministers to be perfect.  It is almost like they hold ministers up to such a high standard that they are not given the opportunity to fail or struggle.  I do not believe that this is intentional or malicious in any way, but I believe that most people in the congregation almost expect ministers to be hold a Christlike standard - perfection.  They place pastors and their families on pedestals where they do not allow for struggles to happen.  I’m sorry, but just because they are the pastor or a member of his/her family does not mean they cannot struggle.  Yet people put them (even spouses) into positions of authority and respect and glorify their every move. Why? Because he/she is the Pastor or a member of his/her family?!?  They are "supposed" to do certain things and act a certain way.  I believe that because of this, the pressure that the congregation, sometimes indirectly, put on ministers, spouses and family to perform is too great and very unrealistic. Not everyone is geared that way.

I believe that we have to have realistic expectations of our “overseers”.   I believe that Paul was right on when he challenged Titus and Timothy (1 Timothy 3:1-9).  But I also believe that people have taken that standard and have expected perfection from them and their families; something that is completely unrealistic for them to ever be able to accomplish.

Ultimately, I believe in privacy and that Church Staffers have the right to privacy as they go through a tough time.  However, as I have seen, it is not that easy of a decision to make – protect staffers privacy.  As I pointed out above and will describe below, there is a lot of “grey” here and protecting ones privacy affects more people than just the staffer and their family.

A Balancing Act

Working in small to medium sized churches and ministries all my life, I know that "community" is a big component in those ministries.  After all, as 1 Corinthians 12:12-27 points out, we are all part of the body of Christ.  That means, when one part of the body suffers, we all suffer.  So, ideally, when a struggling person or family unit comes into the mix, the community would surround and help them through this difficult time.  When this person or family is within the congregation, I have seen such great ministry happen.

The only problem that I have seen in promoting “community” in past situations is when it comes down to a Church staffer and their family.  Although people say they want community and for things to be in the light, when they do come into the light, how does that “community” respond?  Does the community surround the Church staffer and their family?  Or does uproar happens and the staffer and family are kicked to the curb?  How does the Church leadership respond?  Will they support and encourage or dump and run?  Unfortunately, when it comes to Church Staffers, I have seen “community” turn into a nightmare on so many levels.

Ultimately, I believe that if you are a community of believers that means you give grace when grace is needed, forgiveness when forgiveness is needed and you discipline when discipline is needed.  It is definitely a balancing act.  I cannot say that there is a right or wrong way to respond.  Each situation has to be carefully addressed depending on the circumstances. Church leadership definitely has to play a huge role and will have to stand by some pretty hard decisions.

A Final Thought

What I have learned and seen over the years is that if a Church staffer is going through a difficult time in their personal, private life it affects more than just that person and family.  It affects the other church staff as well.  Therefore, if the Church chooses to be silent on that matter in order to protect the staffer and their family while they go through this difficult time, there should be a few things in place:

  1. A Company Line. What will the staff say if people from the congregation ask them what is going on with so-and-so?  If the staffers do not know exactly what to say, you have put them into an awkward position of lying or coming up with something on their own that may not be entirely accurate – again, lying.  By deciding as a staff what to say, you are protecting your staffer but also giving the other staff a peace of mind as to what to say.
  2. Encourage a small group “Community”. When a staffer and their family are going through a tough time, it can be easy to be the “Lone Ranger” and keep 100% silent on the matter.   Instead of being the Lone Ranger, they need to surround themselves with people who can care and support them.  This is not the whole church (as described above), but at least a few other people and/or couples that can help them.  Remember, the battle we all wage, although private, is a spiritual battle (Ephesians 6:12).  Satan is extremely powerful and ready to devour (1 Peter 5:8).  By surrounding themselves with a few people in community, I believe God can work more powerfully through the situation.
  3. Be prepared for fall out. If not handled appropriately and the congregation feels blindsided by a revelation after the fact that they believed was “covered up”, then there could be some serious resentment and fallout (i.e. members leave the church).  I have seen this happen and it becomes very messy.  There is no possible way for the church leadership to be fully prepared for the reaction the congregation makes, but they have to be prepared for fall out.  They have to be prepared to stand by their decisions, knowing full well that if viewed incorrectly, it could cause some real frustration and people leaving.

I believe AND I HAVE SEEN that if you do not have these things in place, it will cause frustration within the staff and with the members of the Church.

As I stated in the beginning, this is strictly my opinion and I may have only scratched the service.  But I want to challenge you to TAKE A MINUTE and think through…

  • How will you respond when the privacy and public knowledge lines get blurred?  What will you do and how will protect without being deceitful?
  • How can you continue to protect yourself and your family?  How can you keep them focused on the Lord and lead them?

If you have something you want to add to this, please voice your opinion.  I just ask that you respect the opinions of others and allow everyone to voice their thoughts.  I believe that this is not a black and white issue, so there are many shades of gray.  If you have experienced this blurred line before, please comment on that as I think it gets more blurry as you walk through it.


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30Apr/100

Community Matters

Just recently, I had to have a sit down with one of our newer volunteer leaders.  The other volunteers were frustrated as they felt he was contributing anything to the team or the ministry.  So my purpose was to sit down and talk with him about what was going on.  What I found out was that very early on, when he decided to be a leader, he did not feel like he was apart of the "community" of leaders at Cedar Run.  He did not feel that the other leaders accepted him so he intentionally disengaged from them and never fully got on board.  I can not tell you if he was right or wrong, but it was his perception and we know that a person's perception is their reality.

What I ultimately got out of that meeting and left with was the fact that community matters.  As Youth Directors and Leaders, we all know the value of building community with your volunteer leaders and needs to be a vital part of your ministry.  If you do not understand ways to develop community with your volunteer leaders, check it out here, here and here.  Having effective leaders starts with the community that is developed between the leaders.  If a leader does not feel apart of the community, then he or she will not be as effective as he/she can be.  The above example is a perfect case in point.

I've outlined ways before, here are a few more ways you can engage your youth leadership team as a community:

  1. Go out and do fun things together.  Go out and play laser tag together or have dinner together.  Or go watch a minor league baseball game together. The point is to go do "friendship" things together so that leaders do not feel that all you, the Youth Director, care about is what they can do for the ministry.  By going out and having fun together, you are showing them that you want to be with them and that you genuinely like them.  That goes a long way to building a good leadership team.
  2. When you have leaders meeting, spend some time talking more than just "business".  Talk about how you all are doing personally and how you all can be praying for each other.  If all you do is sit around and talk "shop", then you are missing a great opportunity to be real with each other and get to really know each other.
  3. Make sure you are connecting with them individually.  Sometimes leaders will feel more a part of the group if they are connecting with the Head Leader, which is you.  So make sure you are taking time out to connect individually with all your leaders on a regular basis.

Although you can do a lot to build community in your ministry, I have also found out that community is a two-way street.  You may have all the above things in place, but like my leader example above, have leaders who still feel disengaged or not apart of the community.  The leaders have to take it upon themselves to want to be apart of community.  You cannot force community and make people want to hang out with each other.  They have to want it just as much.  So what I challenge all my leaders is that if they want to feel apart of the community, as a leader, have:

  • make an extra effort to engage with the other leaders
  • come to leader meetings and leader events so that you know what is going on in the ministry but also have the opportunity to get to know the leaders in a different setting.

These are just two action steps they can do.  But I believe that if they make the effort in these two areas, they will feel more apart of the leadership community.

The reality is community matters.  If your leadership team works together and functions as a community, there is going to be a great benefit to them and to the students.  If you all fail to build an effective community, then the leaders and students will suffer.

So, TAKE A MINUTE and...

  1. Examine your leadership team.  Are you building community within the group or are people feeling disengaged and not contributing?
  2. What can you do this week to build a community of leaders that are going to go after Christ and the youth at your Church together?


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20Apr/1010

POLL: Where does Privacy apply in a Public Leadership Position

Ok folks, I need your help.  I'm working on a new blog post but I want to get some other viewpoints before I release my position on this topic sometime next week.  So I'm asking you to:

  1. Vote in the poll below
  2. Then, more importantly, explain why you voted that way.

Again, as I'm struggling to determine what the right answer is (if there is one), I would love some opinions.

As you see below, the poll is on where does privacy (i.e. your private home life - the life you lead when no one is looking) apply to a very public leadership position (i.e. a Church staff member). I understand and accept the responsibility that as a Staffer, you are held to a higher standard and your life is on display.  But what about your family?  Does everything in your private life need to be public knowledge and opened up to the "body of Christ"?  Or are there things that can remain silent or unspoken so that not everyone in your Church knows every detail of your life (as if you were that important to begin with :) )?

So please, TAKE A MINUTE and take this poll.  Then, offer up a comment and then finally pass it around to others in ministry.  It'd be great to get a good chatter going.

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26Dec/090

Leader Appreciation at Christmas

Last week, Katie and I had our annual Youth Leader Christmas Party with all our volunteer Youth Leaders.  It has become an annual tradition as each year we give our leaders a gift certificate to a local mall and have dinner together. This year, we tried something different. Instead of having dinner at a persons house, we wanted to go out and treat the leaders to a nice dinner and then take some Christmas pictures by the National Christmas Tree in Washington, DC. Unfortunately, traffic and a bigger than expected snow storm wrecked havoc on those plans and we were not able to go into DC.

Because of this, we had to improvise on the fly. We changed plans and decided to go to dinner at a local Italian restaurant which had some very good food. Then, instead of taking pictures in front of the National Christmas Tree, we ended up taking some cool and random pictures in front of random houses and Christmas Trees in the downtown Fairfax area. Here is one.

We drove by some random houses and took pictures. This was one of them.

We drove by some random, overdecorated houses and took pictures. This was one of them. We actually had the homeowner take this picture.

I have found that when we honor our leaders with this dinner and give them Christmas presents, it goes a long way with them.  They feel appreciated and cared for which will hopefully inspire them to go that extra mile in building relationships with the students so that Christ can impact them for eternity.

So, what about you? Do you do anything for your leaders over Christmas? If so, what?

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24Dec/090

It is a Wonderful Life

I love the movie "It's a Wonderful Life" with Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed.  It is a Christmas classic that I try to watch at least once a year.  It's a story of180px-It's_A_Wonderful_Life George Bailey (Jimmy Stewart).  During his life, George constantly gave up his hopes and dreams so that others can benefit. For example,

  • he gave up a chance to travel the world and go to school when his dad died and he had to take over the family business. By doing this, he also allowed Harry, his younger brother, to go to college since money was tight and only 1 person could go to college at a time.
  • when Harry arrived home from college with a wife and a great job offer, he gave up his hopes of traveling and getting an education again because no one would take over the family business.
  • he sacrificed his honeymoon so that he can save the family business from a run at the bank.  His new wife and he would never go on the honeymoon.

Although hard at times, George's willingness to be flexible and unselfish with his life, greatly impacted a whole town.  At the end of the movie, Harry poses a toast to George for being "the richest man in town" for all the lives he has impacted.

As I was watching this movie this year, I was reminded of Youth Ministers.  It can be very hard at times to invest in the lives of students, but in the end, we end up being the richest people in town.  I have had countless times in which I look at my life in ministry and wonder if all the sacrifices I make is worth it.  Is the non-consistent schedule worth it?  Is the lack of quality pay worth it?  Are the choices I have to make that involve my family worth it?

Although hard sometimes, I know that they are worth it and that I am the "richest man in town".  God has provided for my family and I in so many ways that I can not even begin to thank him for his blessings and provisions.  I have also seen the Lord touch so many lives while I have been in ministry that I wonder where those people would be today had I not been in ministry.  Yes, the choices and the sacrifices I make are tough and "not fair" sometimes.  But, in the long run, I end up being blessed so much more.

So, in this Christmas season, I know that I have a wonderful life.  And, I hope and pray that you all, as fellow Youth Workers, realized that you have a wonderful life as well.

Merry Christmas!  Christ is born!

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9Oct/091

Core Leadership Values

In a vision statement you process what you want to be about as a youth program from a macro level.  Hopefully it will help guide your every move and make you a more effective ministry by giving you guidance on what you commit to and what you say no to.  A few years ago, I had a thorough evaluation done of our entire youth program by 3 experienced youth workers (volunteer and full-time) who took a hard look at our ministry.  As I debriefed with them the evaluation of our overall ministry, it was recommended to me that our Youth Leadership team (staff and volunteers combined) have a core set of values that we commit to.

The purpose of creating these was to identify values that we believe are vitally important in our ministry and commit to them.  It’s important to identify what your leadership team will be because it keeps you focused on what you view as important in your ministry.   As with all things, unless you make it clear what you are striving for as a team, no one will know for sure.  They will just be able to guess that what you are about.

At Cedar Run, we have 4 Core Leadership Values that we strive for.  They are:

  1. Prayer is our work; ministry is merely the fruit of that work.
  2. We can only take others as far as we have allowed ourselves to journey in Christ
  3. Kids remember how we made them feel, and what they saw in us – not anything we taught them up front. Therefore, it is our relationships, not our programs that truly bear fruit.
  4. Work together in unison with team members.  Be encouraging and uplifting at all time.

From my example, you can tell that we value Prayer, Personal Discipleship, Relationships and Encouragement.  What about your Youth Leadership team?  What are you about as a leadership team?  What are your goals and priorities?  Just like mission statements, there are no rhyme or reason as to what your core leadership values are.  It all depends on what you, as a leadership team, deem as important and worth striving for.

TAKE A MINUTE and...

  1. Jot down some core leadership principles you want to be about as a Youth Leadership Team.
  2. When you are done, present them before your volunteer leaders and together come up with your Core Leadership Values.

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